I’m on the journey of my life right now. Shit just got REAL.


I’m following it, and I’m going to write about my experiences on this path, because this is going to be one hell of a ride.

All of the vast and arching lessons that I’ve learned have been fragments of experience, scattered and disjointed. They have worked individually, but not in collaboration. Enlightenment is the mother of all magnets, amalgamating all of it. It brings all of your shit together in a line, and makes it stand up and pay attention. It allows all of these experiences to coalesce. An overhaul of synchronicity that manifests synergy. Synergy is where it’s at. When it happens, everything lines up. You are whole, centered, grounded, and completely mindful in the moments. It is nothing short of mind-blowing. And all of this…this altered state…without drugs, without alcohol, without any other substance needed to take you anywhere. Just you, in your authentic state. I know, deep shit, right? Stay with me…


That can be a scary fucking word. Scarier than Willard Scott, walking towards me, naked, with a jar of Smucker’s. I’ve written before on vulnerability, but now is My Time. My. Fucking. Time. My time to feel, open, accept, love, be loved, accept love, give love, take the risk, trust in all of it, and fly. Fuck fear, fuck doubt, fuck guilt. Useless emotions. Drop all that shit, you’ve carried it all this time. It’s heavy, set it down and walk away. Never look back. You’ve done the work, you do the work, stop preventing yourself from reaping the rewards.


In Buddhism, humility is equivalent to a concern of how to be liberated from the sufferings of life and the vexations of the human mind. The ultimate aim is to achieve a state of enlightenment through meditation and other spiritual practices. Humility can also result from achieving the liberation of Nirvana. When one experiences the ultimate Emptiness (Shunyata) and non-self (Anatta), one is free from suffering, vexations, and all illusions of self-deception. Humility, compassion, and wisdom characterize this state of enlightenment. This is key.

Self Realization.

Self-realization is a maturing of the ego or personality to accept its own evanescence and thus allow space for the true Self to reveal itself. The sun veiled by clouds is an apt metaphor for the Self’s apparent absence in our everyday lives. The dissolution of the ego’s obsessive, internal pre-occupations with its psycho-somatic complexes frees the psyche’s energy to directly experience reality of the world as it is, free of any assumptions.

What the hell? I know, right?! I really, truly feel, that for the first time, I am seeing the world. Music sounds better, colors are brighter, there is beauty everywhere and I am so blessed. It all makes sense, it is so simple. Just do the next right thing, and all of those unique and tiny moments will be the sum total of a beautiful and fulfilling life.

The most important part…YOU CAN’T KEEP IT IF YOU DON’T GIVE IT AWAY.

Breathe, smile, love, help others, be grateful, you’re here. Right now, and there is a reason that you just read this.


28 replies

  1. Let go and trust. Beautifully crafted thoughts and words, Tracy. Thank you for the insight and reminder. I’m glad the here I chose to be in in this moment was your writing.

    • I’m glad you’re here too. There’s a reason for all of it, you’re a part of it. I know we will sit together one day, as sure as the clouds blow through the sky.

  2. I get it, I really do, and I’m one of the most cynical people I know. I’ve started doing this restorative yoga shit, and it freaking works! I think I relaxed for the first time in 37 years. Be careful, though, according to EW Jackson, GOP candidate in Virginia, if you empty yourself you might let the devil in. You can read about it in my latest post if you dare. Scary stuff!

    Seriously, though, this was great. Namaste.

  3. Clarity is pretty fucking exciting, especially when you’re able to articulate it like you’ve done. Tracy, you’ve ended this post with one of my all-time favorite LIVING concepts!
    That is my birdcage whose door is always left open, or completely gone.

    Can’t wait to read more! Peace and more invigoration ahead, huh!?

  4. You know, I never had that Willard Scott image until you put it in my brain. I wish you hadn’t chosen to give THAT particular gift away. 😉

    Sounds like you’re making some great strides in your life to being the person you want to be. Go, you! Nothing is quite as empowering as taking on the challenge of personal growth.

  5. Very beautiful. I’m on this same roller coaster ride. It’s scary and fun and I want more and I want off all at the same time. ‘The dissolution of the ego’s obsessive, internal pre-occupations with its psycho-somatic complexes frees the psyche’s energy to directly experience reality of the world as it is, free of any assumptions.’ – right where I’m at. WOW. Yer good.

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