10 things you didn’t know about me.

1. I once created an intestinal sculpture using only a 2 lb block of cheddar cheese and a package of Sour Patch Kids.

2. I invented the Apple computer, and Steve Jobs stole it.

3. I invented the Internet.

4. I once danced privately for Patrick Swayze and he called me “baby” the whole time. Since then I’ve been a pretty big deal.

5. Sometimes on Sundays, I like to pretend I have Guillain-Barre syndrome.

6. I would like very much to contract Alopecia of the genital region.

7. Every time I laugh, an Angel gets their wings.

8. I would like to get a baby Tamarin and name it Tom Selleck and take it with me everywhere I go.

9. I can make a vagina out of origami.

10. I invented the circle.

55 replies

  1. Tracy,
    Don’t judge me: “I once danced privately for Patrick Swayze and he called me “baby” the whole time. Since then I’ve been a pretty big deal.”
    …My wife had to explain this one to me… I’m afraid to say what I really think of the movie…
    Le Clown

    • Curmudgeon,
      I love that you have the capability to make intestinal origami. You are indeed a visionary. Now if you’ll excuse me I have to get back to inventing something I like to call the “wheel”.
      Tracy

  2. I must do a post like this. Until then if you contract alopecia of the genital region, please write down how it happened and pass it along to me. It would be much appreciated.

  3. Was it the circle or the circle jerk you invented? Also, the vagina origami was a work of genius. Have you seen storkhunter’s post on vaginas? There’s a coloring book for them! Full of vaginas! Now I’m wondering if there’s a “vagina pink” crayon.

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