Once upon a time there was a girl named Jennifer. Jennifer lived with her husband Todd and they owned a dog named Bruha. They lived in Sanford Florida in a little house with a cute little fenced in backyard.
Bruha loved to play outside in the yard. Bruha loved to dig. Bruha would stay outside and enjoy the comforts of his doghouse and playing in the yard when Jennifer and Todd were at work.
Bruha began digging a hole under the fence and going into the neighbor’s yard. Bruha liked to shit over there much better. Once he was done shitting up the neighbor’s yard he would return back through his hole under the fence and wait in his doghouse for Jennifer and Todd to get home.
The neighbors did not have a dog, making them sans dog.
Jennifer and Todd had no idea of Bruhas defecating escapades.
One day, Jennifer and Todd received a note on the door from their neighbors. The note read, “please keep your dog from shitting in our yard.” They scratched their heads and looked at one another as if to say, “what the fuck?” but without actually saying it.
Jennifer and Todd went outside to do a little investigating. Upon closer observation they noticed the hole that Bruha had dug under the fence. “Bad Dog!” they scolded, and quickly filled up the hole.
The next day it was back to business as usual. Jennifer and Todd went back to work, and Bruha re-dug his hole under the fence and took his shit in the neighbor’s yard.
Jennifer and Todd returned home to find another note, “PLEASE keep your dog in your own yard!!!” They were so embarrassed and went back outside to fill up the hole. While they were out there they waved apologetically to their neighbors who just gave them a disgusted look and went back into their house. Jennifer and Todd filled the hole with extra dirt and rocks and told Bruha, “NO DIGGING! BAD DOG!”
They considered leaving him in the house when they went to work, but then he would just shit in the house, so they decided against it.
The next day when they arrived home, they noticed that the hole was re-dug, but there was no note from the neighbor. This pattern continued for about a week.
it was a very hot and sunny Friday when Jennifer got home from work. When she entered the house she heard a strange howling whimper coming from the back porch. When she opened the door to the back yard, there stood Bruha, with a blue plastic grocery bag tied to his collar…filled with all of his dog shit.
Categories: True Stories